Stuck in Repetition 

More and more information is being found. I’m left speechless. This country is turning into a mini America. How can that be?! I thought it was a progressive place here with their sense of helping others without any underline goal. Here in Sweden they recycle nearly 100% of household waste. They have some of the best schools in the world. Also, gender equality is leaps and bounds better than many other countries.


But the more I’m learning, it is like here they are repeating what America has done in the past. You would think here they would learn from America’s mistakes and NOT follow in their footsteps! It seems any other way is lost to them. 

America with its shiny media blinding many from seeing what is really happening there. My heart breaks to see that it is like a replay button has been hit in this country. But I will not stand not sit for it to happen. Here, I feel my voice can be heard and won’t be muffled by corporations or anyone for that matter. My words may even hold some personal meaning to others. 

Everyone no matter race,gender, age, or sexuality, should stand together, no matter what! 

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Granite National Park

Now this trip was in June, before all the fires that now have destroyed such a tranquil place.


Beauty took over the horizon as we drove closer. Mountains were taking over the view. Many had snowy tops. We make it through the gate, and our adventures begin! The sound of water could be heard and as we drove in deeper, the sound became thunderous. We pull over to find a jaw dropping view of a gigantic waterfall. It felt as though we have been transported through time. To the land that was untouched by man. 
It took us about two days to see as much as we could of the west and east glacier. One of he paths was closed due to a snow Avalanche. I guess here, that is usual around the end of May.


Our next obstacle would be making it to the Canadian side. Glacier-Waterton National Park. Once we drove up to the border, we had to check in.  The ranger asked if we had papers for certification of rabies for my parents dog. Whoops, nope. She looked at the tiny dog and said, “Well he’s not foaming from the mouth, you guys can go on ahead.” 

I was relieved she didn’t check our records. I had a DUI. 

On the Canadian side, the breathtaking beauty had intensified. First off, the roads were well paved. Not like the zig zag roller coaster drive in Montana. There was a historic hotel on top of a mountain that overlooked a lake. From a far, it looked as though it was from a fairy tale. This trip was filled with waterfalls and a peaceful atmosphere. 


It was the beginning of the sun setting and many animals sprang to life. High on a steep mountain, you could see mountain goats climbing. There were Rams that walked right passed us, and deer just pranced through the edge of a tourist town. In tall grass, we could see a moose far away laying down.


On our way out, my mother spotted something! Across the lake a brown bear was hunting for fish in the water. We pulled over to get a better look and another family was nice enough to let us take a closer look through their camera. It was amazing!


The Pain of the Weather

6/14/17

The weather has been pounding on my head profusely. Another day with High humidity in the air. This pulls at me, chipping off pieces of myself. It has been three years, but I still am having issues. South Dakota is not the place for my head. This crazy weather and drastic temperatures are not my friends. If only this could be harmonious in my brain. But seldon is anything easy. I guess that is a part of life. Since surviving the bad, I cherish life much more. Humans need the bad with the good to understand how to appreciate the good things.


Pushing forward is not going to work today. Every step I go on ward, I am pushed back twice as much! The pain becomes more threatening. I’m at a stand still. When will this weather clear up? Let me be free! I am barricaded inside this house. If I venture out, the pain finds me quickly. 

What a nightmare! This weather holds the pain a waiting me where ever I go!

Sucked in yet Again


6/9/17

I’m back in the midwest, once again. It’s like there is a black hole that keeps bringing be back here no matter how far I get. Many times I have felt trapped here. Stuck in a pile of muck, unable to move. My plans have had to changed drastically multiple times. The obstacles I have endured are not easy and tend to bring me to this flat farmland state. Maybe some day my feelings for this place will change. As of now, it doesn’t feel like home anymore.

 There is a huge gap for equality between men and women here. And now, big companies are weaseling their way into town to avoid taxes. A dark shadow hangs over this city, but sometimes a glint of light shows through. Maybe just maybe there is light at the end of the tunnel!

Need Help With Enduring Pain

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The accident Endured

So here I am, between a rock and a hard place. I have to figure out how I am going to pay all my medical bills off. The cost is $180,000.00. I was in a bad 7 car pile up. I was on my way to California from South Dakota. I made it as far as Rock Springs, Wyoming, before this wreck happened. Since three years has passed, I have made it far. I can do many things at the beginning of healing, I could not. This took about a year of physical training and being stubborn. I kept pushing myself everyday to get better. Even when doctors told me I would be like this for the rest of my life. I still made myself keep trying. Everyday is still difficult to get up because the pain does not take a break. I still push myself. But if you can see in your heart that you can help, just press the link above, or share with friends and family. I am not sure that the money given from the accident will cover all of my hospital bills. That is why I have created this. Plus, it seems more likely that I will always have these back, neck, and head pains the rest of my life.

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I understand if you can’t donate, I know right now, it would be difficult for me, but please at least share. Thank you very much!

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Granite Ghost Town Awaits

5/26/17

 

Dilapidated buildings were sprawled through out the woods. I can feel the history in the air. Granite Ghost Town lies 4 miles up a mountain in Montana.

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Drive up at your own risk! Zero maintenance roads ahead! My mom and I looked at each other once we read the sign. I was filled with excitement, but my mom was filled with worry. As our journey began, the road was becoming more narrow as we progressed. One side of the road clung to the mountain, the other side was a rugged cliff. Halfway up, the view to our side was spectacular! We could see the town sprawled out and the sunset beginning to take over the open sky. Once we made it to the top, many old buildings were left in pieces. But some with stood over the years, the building where the head honcho lived that took care of the town and one house that was owned by the last person to leave the town. She was an elderly lady that lived in this town for about 20 years alone!! Some of the parts of houses were becoming one with the trees in areas. The rest of the buildings lay in piles of rubble.

What a crazy place for a town! It is so high up in the mountain, plus this was in the days where vehicles were a new technology. But they created some machine that helped them bring down the rocks of silver and gold down where they could harvest it properly. The view left me in awe and the feeling here made me realize why so many would live in a place like this. Everything held tranquility in its grasps. I breathe in deeply and exhale, feeling a calmness.

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The Beauty Dims

 

The mystical lake glints with beauty. It is breathtaking! The feeling of peace washes over me. But my thoughts wander to this place when it is tourist season. So many people bustling around, taking away the beauty with the loudness, traffic, and energy. Many rush to and fro. The one main street is covered in vehicles. Many of the nature still surrounds this town in South Lake Tahoe, but even there, the sounds of cars destroys the peace of wilderness.

Before this place turned into a money maker, it was sacred to the Native Americans. Now wildlife is being overtaken by people and buildings. This land still holds its glimmer though, and hopefully it will for a long time.

We reached and path away from many people. Down the steep side of a hill we went. Once we made it to the rocky area, the lake water crashed against the rocks, showing its strength. The view left me breathless. No cars could be heard down here, only the whipping of the water hitting stones. This is what I like, being away from the busy town.

Nowadays, so many don’t even know how to enjoy the little things in life. Take away your eyes from your phone and enjoy the outside world! Look up and see the stars!

Even with finding some hidden paths, this is still too busy for me. It takes away nature’s tranquility. But Tomorrow a new path will be reached.

The Traveling Sorrows

5/16/17

My patience are becoming limited. This time, a part leaves an empty hole in my heart filling with an ache of pain. Sorrow rampages inside trying to claw its way out. But I cannot give in. I have to enjoy my time back here. My friends and family are ecstatic about my arrival. Seems it is time for a road trip. Soon the journey will begin.

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But right now, I must say goodbye to this small town in California that I once called home. It has been nice savoring the high mountains covered with life.Trees are in every direction you look. A nice cool breeze whips through, leaving a bit of a chill in its place. But it is great when working outside. Almost everyday has been filled with work, which I’m happy for!
Hard work, that’s what I like. Bring on more!

But soon this will be just another memory and the book of life will carry on to another chapter.

Hayfork, California

Friends that I have found in this special town have left me with quirky memories that will never be forgotten, even with my memory loss! These I want to hold onto. Until the end calls upon my door. I’m not going down with out a fight!

The bug of Travel

Another day in the Pines. Good Ole Hayfork, California. Where the sun shines brightly, almost unbearably so. The past few days the sun has been pounding down on me. But it only becomes a nuisance in the heat of the day. 


This town hasn’t changed much since the last time I was here. Many locals have warm and welcoming arms when I came into town. It makes me miss my days of living out here in the mountains. This small town was like the wild west. But nowadays, I stop just to visit. My body soon will begin to feel the itch to travel again. Soon I will travel other places in America before my journey goes back to my new home, Sweden.

The land of fairy tales and mystery. My backyard there is a forest that feels as though it is from a magical book. The time will soon come when I go back to that wonderful land.

Twisted

Written in 2008

Tears dripped down her already wet cheeks splashing on her now damp paper. The only noise in the room was the patient sound of the clock, ticking with every tear. Her eyes finally became dry and puffy, but her heart felt a clenching ache. No one would ever see this, she thought as she tightly hugged her notebook. A deep gasp came out of her with realisation. 

Denial is a powerful thing. She pondered on that thought. Nothing would be the same again. She can no longer stare in awe and have so much passion towards him. 

No one can ever get that close, not again. 

Her mind starts to wonder to the past. She thought, what if it could work? But the thought slammed her back to reality. Her stonewall of security will now be barricaded. No one is getting in.


Her eyes travel to the ceiling as she feels the tears returning. She fights for control. No she will not cry again. She is stronger than that. Her heart has been trampled on before. So this should be easy to bare.